My book, A Mom's Guide to Life After Divorce references the resources listed below. Click each one to learn more:
Know the Details of Your Situation
Take the time to clearly understand all the details of your divorce. When you do that, you'll know what to expect, and nothing will blindside you.
It may seem like an obvious thing to do, but a surprising number of people go through their divorce process and end up uncertain of what they've agreed to.
There are quite a few critical questions and factors you will need to have answers for:
Your Divorce Agreement
Home and Living Arrangements
Design A Parenting Agreement
Your divorce lawyer or mediator should be able to help you create a parenting agreement that works for you and your unique situation.
If you prefer to create your own, here are some resources and templates that may be helpful to you:
Between Two Homes: http://www.childreninthemiddle.com/documents/SampleParentingplan.pdf
Splitting Up? Put Kids First: http://www.splittingup-putkidsfirst.org.uk/home
3 Step Parenting Plan: http://www.3stepparentingplan.com/
Rocket Lawyer: https://www.rocketlawyer.com/document/parenting-plan.rl
Set Up A Calendaring System
You’ll need a dependable system for recording all your family’s activities. There are lots to choose from. Online versions can make it easy to share information between households. Check out the ones listed below. One of them might be perfect for your situation:
2 Houses: https://www.2houses.com/en/
Our Family Wizard: https://www.ourfamilywizard.com/
Two Happy Homes: https://www.twohappyhomes.com/
Your home tool kit should include basic things such as:
assortment of nails and picture-hanging hardware
spackle (for patching small holes)
ladder or stepstool
Here are a few links with instructions on how to assemble a home tool kit that works for you:
Home improvement and hardware stores often carry tool sets that include many of these basic items:
Check out these videos to learn how to:
Change furnace filters: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGYrVgFSzV4
Unclog a sink drain: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMFBP6dX5fY
Unclog a toilet: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BA-11wvO9lk
Use a drill: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0tTDNWn0eQ
Get On Top Of Your Finances
Being in control of your money and knowing how much you have is powerful. When you control your money, you have choices. And I want you to have as many choices about your life as possible.
Click the link below to access my Monthly Income and Expense Tracking/Cash Flow spreadsheet. Using a document like this will make the job of tracking and managing your financial life a lot easier.
Square Up Shared Expenses
There are typically a lot of kids' expenses that parents agree to share as part of their divorce agreement. And while the decision to share the expenses is one accomplishment, the payment of and reimbursement to each other for those expenses can be an ongoing challenge. It means you need to keep your spending records up to date and the payments to each other current.
Click the link below to access my Shared Expense Journal spreadsheet. It shows an example and gives a structure to follow for tracking this important information.
There are many helpful online versions on shared expense journals available. Here are a few to check out:
Create a Plan for Paperwork
Even though the world is largely digital, the ongoing daily business of living still requires that we process and manage a lot of paperwork.
When you add a divorce--and all the related paperwork--to the equation, you have a recipe for a huge paper blizzard in your home if you don't stay on top of managing it all.
If you put a system in place to track all of the paperwork it takes to run your life, you'll be glad you did. It will save you endless hours searching through boxes for important documents you need.
For help with creating your own system, click the link below to access my Household Document Planning and Filing System.
Plan Ahead for Dinner
As a single parent there is just one of you to pick up your kids, bring them home and make dinner. Because of that, the job of planning healthy meals for your family is really important.
Pre-planned, healthy dinners make the whole week better. Kids are fed before they are starving. Homework starts on time. Bath time goes as planned. It's like a magic wand for a peaceful evening.
An important part of making it all work is to be organized about meal planning and food shopping. The links below will help you get started: